This is one of the funniest and most bizarre moments in the movie Mean Girls, released back in 2004. Okay, wow, that is a long time ago. Am I getting old? Who am I kidding? I’ll be turning 36 this year - That’s geriatric in gay years. If I didn’t look or act half my age, I’d be a total “Daddy” right about now. This probably explains why all the twinks keep throwing themselves at me. Calm down boys, I’m still on your level. Give me another 20-30 years to reach “Daddy” status.

Silly Mean Girls movie quotes aside; many of you awesome internet people don’t seem to be aware that I am from South Africa. I felt it important enough to address this issue here on The Davi Mail, even though South Africa is listed in my bio on my website and all my social media profiles. I’m also often asked, “why are you there?” Or “what are you doing there?”

“What are you doing there?”

Well, on my father’s side; my great-grandpa was from Europe (France) and my great-grandma was from the USA. Great-grandpa went over to America where he met great-grandma and then they came to South Africa. On my mother’s side; my great-grandparents were both from Germany and that’s pretty much all I know about them. So I guess you could say that theoretically, I’m 50% German, 25% French, and 25% American in the third (or fourth) generation, but in reality, I’m just 100% South African.

I was born here in South Africa, as were my parents and grandparents. I grew up here, and I live here. Yes, there are white people born in Africa for multiple generations already. Not every Caucasian you see here is an ex-pat or a tourist! I am South African - though not to be mistaken as an Afrikaner.

Afrikaners are the Afrikaans-speaking White South Africans and direct descendants of the early settlers (Voortrekkers) from The Great Trek; colonizers, and masterminds of the inhumane Apartheid regime. My South African lineage only dates back two generations. I am not an Afrikaner nor a descendent of the “Voortrekkers”. I am simply South African by birth. If you want to be weird about it, you may probably refer to me as a French White African-American German. But honestly, who cares? We’re all Human Earthlings, as far as I’m concerned. The concepts of patriotic nationalism and race determined by one’s cultural heritage, location, or the color of one’s skin are bizarre to me. We’re all earthlings part of the human race.

“How is life in South Africa? Isn’t being gay illegal over there?”

This is another question that frequently pops up in conversation. First of all, this is South Africa (the country), not Africa (the continent). South Africa is a country on the African continent in the same way that Canada is a country on the North American continent. Yes, homosexuality is illegal in some African countries but South Africa is not one of them.

South Africa probably has one of the most liberal constitutions in the world, if not THE MOST. We have full equality here, the LGBTQ+ community thrives, and we even have legal polyamory/polygamy. You may have multiple husbands and/or wives if you so choose. Same-sex couples are allowed to legally marry and adopt children. Churches pay taxes. Abortion is legal. There is no death penalty. We have strict gun-control laws. We have equal representation of all genders in positions of power. There are people from all races, cultures, and religions here, and everyone is free to openly live their truth. It’s one of the most liberal, diverse, culturally vibrant nations on earth.

It’s all pretty great, except for one thing; The most corrupt government in the world. As a result of the ANC (our ruling political party)’s corruption, State-owned Enterprises have all fallen into disarray and disrepair. We have water shortages, an energy crisis resulting in widespread daily rolling blackouts, unreliable public services, and dilapidated infrastructure.

If you’re wealthy enough to not be affected by any of these things then South Africa is the most incredible place to be - with the most diverse culture and more freedoms than any other country in the world. If, however, you are middle-class or below, or living with a disability (such as me), you may have a difficult time trying to build the life of your dreams in this country, as you’re basically on your own with little support from the government - relying mostly on the understanding, support, and generosity of family and friends to get by.

Many of those who can afford to leave have already left to start a new life in a fully functional first-world nation. If I could afford to leave, I would’ve also been long gone already as the ever-worsening energy crisis severely hampers my productivity and often results in debilitating depression, and struggling financially to make ends meet. But then again, if I could afford to leave, I would’ve also been wealthy enough to mitigate the majority of the issues here, and thus would’ve perhaps been less inclined to leave. Who knows.

Honestly, despite all the issues; I keep doing what I can, where I am, with what I have, and I do love this country but perhaps that’s only because I haven’t ever been anywhere else so I can’t make a fair comparison. South Africa is all I know from a first-person perspective. Sure, I’ve seen and heard many things about other countries but I am yet to personally experience life in a different country. Maybe I’ll get to do that someday, or maybe not. But right now this is where I am, this is what I know, and this is how it is. I was born here, and I live here, and yes, I am white. It’s comical to me that some people (Americans, mostly) don’t seem to understand this.

But there you have it. Now please, for the love of whichever deity you do or don’t believe in; please stop asking why I’m here and what I’m doing here! I am South African!

Thank you for reading!

Thank you for reading the first issue of The Davi Mail! Keep an eye on your inbox for future issues as I’ll have some really exciting news to share very soon! Here’s a little hint: 🎶🎤🎹🎧